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Attending a Homosexual union?

Christos3

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I really do not want to attend the union, but all my family from around the country is going to the event. So really bothered that I will miss the opportunity for the family reunion. I thought about showing up for before and after, but that is awkward and can only make matters worse. Anyway, anyone else had this struggle? Thanks
 

Saxon

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Yes, and the answer was no. I had a close female friend who, despite previously being heterosexual, began dating a woman, eventually becoming engaged. I declined the wedding invitation and told the truth when asked why. That was the end of that friendship.
 

Stinky

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My understanding of attending a marriage or "union ceremony " means you are there to support the couple, to give a blessing.
Yes, I have been in awkward wedding invites and have declined. May God give you wisdom.
 

Stinky

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My daughter just didn't invite me to hers. Then a few weeks later sent pics. She had a private ceremony in the mountains and only a few people were invited, including my other daughter. She spared me the whole thing.
 

bwallace23350

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I would not go. I would tell them I love them or care for them but would not go. Honesty is the best policy. If you want to see family go to the location abut don't attend the wedding and see family.
 

Stinky

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I have told divorced and remarriage people I could not go to their wedding also for same reason- that I cannot bless the union by my presence. But assured them I love them.
 

bwallace23350

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I have told divorced and remarriage people I could not go to their wedding also for same reason- that I cannot bless the union by my presence. But assured them I love them.
Don't the EO allow second marriages after the Bishop approves it?
 

LizaSymonenko

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I would not attend. It can be used as an opportunity to show others that you strongly believe the Church's teachings on marriage, and perhaps your resolve will strengthen others.

The time comes when we all must take a stand.
 

augustin717

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Don't the EO allow second marriages after the Bishop approves it?
Three officially, but depending on your connections, status and determination to have a church wedding it can go past that as I’ve seen in my home country.
 

Stinky

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So, when one is invited to a fourth, fifth, or sixth re marriage wedding ceremony just treat it as you would a homosexual union ceremony, same theory: unlawful.
 

bwallace23350

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So, when one is invited to a fourth, fifth, or sixth re marriage wedding ceremony just treat it as you would a homosexual union ceremony, same theory: unlawful.
Would it be licit in the church? No. The EO's have about the same teaching as the ACNA on this. We will for the most part allow a 2nd marriage as a concession to sin. 3rd marriages are hard to come by but I guess they do happen but 4th marriages are not an option unless spouses keep dying. Now if someone, who was a sinner, and on their 10 marriage came to repentance and wanted to join the church they would be received in a long with their current marriage.
 

Stinky

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It's complicated. We are all sinners. Im sure each case is different and the Bishop uses wisdom for each.
When I joined Orthodox, most of my family disowned me. So I dont get invites to alot of weddings or bachelorette parties, no more strip clubs or bar hopping. So I throw myself into my church and the people there are my new family and friends and pretty much my whole world now. My family knows my stand on it all. When you get an invite to a gay union just say no. Eventually they will ditch you, disown you, and you wont get invites any more.
 

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I honestly don't know what I would do in that situation. My knee-jerk reaction would be not to attend but then again I would probably attend if a friend or relative would remarry after a divorce which is a sin too. I guess I would try to get away with not attending while hoping not to seem like bigoted idiot.
 

hecma925

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I honestly don't know what I would do in that situation. My knee-jerk reaction would be not to attend but then again I would probably attend if a friend or relative would remarry after a divorce which is a sin too. I guess I would try to get away with not attending while hoping not to seem like bigoted idiot.
Bigot ot hypocrite, your choice.

Anyway, I thought Finns don't even have social engagements.
 

Christos3

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Not all who remarry after a divorce is sinful. The church does give exceptions: threat to a spouse or child's life, desertion, sexual immorality, adultery. According to the study Bible "The Orthodox church allows divorce and a second marriage as a concession to human weakness and as a corrective measure of compassion when a a marriage has been broken."
"A third marriage is permitted only under specific, limited circumstances, and a fourth marriage is never permitted."
I don't see remarrying the same as a same sex union. The heterosexual couple remarrying is now entering into a Holy union and sacrament. Whereas a same sex marriage action is a mockery of God's creation. In Matthew 19:4-6 Christ is pretty specific in that "at the beginning God made them male and female..."
 

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Anyway, I thought Finns don't even have social engagements.
We don't. Getting married is a wonderful reason to shut up. That's what the couple will do in a decade or so so better get some practice early on.

Not all who remarry after a divorce is sinful. The church does give exceptions: threat to a spouse or child's life, desertion, sexual immorality, adultery. According to the study Bible "The Orthodox church allows divorce and a second marriage as a concession to human weakness and as a corrective measure of compassion when a a marriage has been broken."
It's allowed but still regrettable and sinful.
 

bwallace23350

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Not all who remarry after a divorce is sinful. The church does give exceptions: threat to a spouse or child's life, desertion, sexual immorality, adultery. According to the study Bible "The Orthodox church allows divorce and a second marriage as a concession to human weakness and as a corrective measure of compassion when a a marriage has been broken."
"A third marriage is permitted only under specific, limited circumstances, and a fourth marriage is never permitted."
I don't see remarrying the same as a same sex union. The heterosexual couple remarrying is now entering into a Holy union and sacrament. Whereas a same sex marriage action is a mockery of God's creation. In Matthew 19:4-6 Christ is pretty specific in that "at the beginning God made them male and female..."
Fun fact a Byzantine Emperor did engage in a 4th marriage and it caused a huge uproar and a lot of troubles. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leo_VI_the_Wise#Marriages
 

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Question: if the gays are not part of the church and invite us to their civil union ceremony, do we hold them accountable to the church standard?
If the divorced are not part of the church and haven't repented but rather openly hate their former spouce(es) and a Bishop hasn't done his thing in what he does to make the mess go away ( absolving the whole thing?), do we attend the sinners divorced remarriage ceremony that hasn't been cleaned up/ annuled/ blessed/ forgiven by the Bishop?
Both would be sinful unions?
 

hecma925

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Arise, O LORD; save me, O my God: for thou hast smitten all mine enemies upon the cheek bone; thou hast broken the teeth of the ungodly.
 

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Woe is me! For I am undone; because I am a man of unclean lips.
Isaiah 6:5
 

xariskai

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Any excuse I can use to get out of going to a wedding, I use. Give me a funeral any day of the week.
Great quote and understandable sentiment (just pray don't apply to the marriage supper of the Lamb ;) ).

On the other hand even for the worst of us, whatever our sin, where life remains hope also remains. From that standpoint perhaps a bad wedding is better than a good funeral, even if it is a bad wedding we feel we cannot bless or attend.

If we must decline such offers we can always say though we are unable to be there we will offer our continual prayers.
 
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JTLoganville

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We declined attending a Wedding of an extended family member because it took place on Good Friday and we were very open about why we declined.

There were hard feelings for a couple of years but eventually they were set aside.
 

Stinky

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Off topic- but about attending unlawful unions, I remembered today that I attended a remarriage of someone who was getting married for 5th time. So Im a hypocrite on all my words here. Lord have mercy!
 

hecma925

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Off topic- but about attending unlawful unions, I remembered today that I attended a remarriage of someone who was getting married for 5th time. So Im a hypocrite on all my words here. Lord have mercy!
Still married?
 

Nathanael

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My understanding of attending a marriage or "union ceremony " means you are there to support the couple, to give a blessing.
Yes, I have been in awkward wedding invites and have declined. May God give you wisdom.
So if my mother wants to be cremated when she dies, I should not visit the funeral so not to support her sin?
This "I don't wanna give a blessing by being present" thing is strange. I don't give a blessing by being present. To visit such a wedding would for me mean to show to my friend that I accept her freedom (and not her sin and not the symbolism of that ceremony).
 

Nathanael

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I don't even talk to my homosexual brother-in-law.
why?


If a friend of you changes her girlfriend/boyfriend for years every 2 months having with all of them a sexual relationship, would you decline to speak with him/her?
I respect a homosexual, who is able to be in a life time partnership, more than such heterosexuals who changes their partners like their underwear.

We have often a hypocrite attitude towards homosexuals, treating them as the worst sinners. But we often forget that in the deepest illusion and most far away from God are those who are proud. So simple.
I'm against homosexuality, to be clear. There are a lot of other sins which could be worth to be dismissed in our society in the same way like we do with homosexuality, but our whole condemnation-attention is on homosexuality. strange.
 

Stinky

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So if my mother wants to be cremated when she dies, I should not visit the funeral so not to support her sin?
This "I don't wanna give a blessing by being present" thing is strange. I don't give a blessing by being present. To visit such a wedding would for me mean to show to my friend that I accept her freedom (and not her sin and not the symbolism of that ceremony).
Im a hypocrite. Don't listen to anything I say.
 

hecma925

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I don't talk to him because he was a jackass to his sister, my wife, as well to his own father and mother, effectively disowning them. So, it's not just the gayness. His personality and actions are related to his homosexuality.

Things are much better that he is not in our lives.
 

Nathanael

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I don't talk to him because he was a jackass to his sister, my wife, as well to his own father and mother, effectively disowning them. So, it's not just the gayness. His personality and actions are related to his homosexuality.

Things are much better that he is not in our lives.
thanks for clarifying (y)
 

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I don't think anything, any sin compares to that of a man doing ,Husband and Wife do together things , with another man ~ or the same with a woman with a woman ~ the reason being ~ unlike the thief or the prostitute who are told to sin no more, the homosexual is bent on continual mutual masterbation and penetration ```

I think anything a man and woman do together will be smiled on by our Lord ~ is their own business ~ all through Christianity and the Holy Books far into the Ages we have read, believed and taught the filth and evil of Sodomy in tradition ~ now the ~ he is a girl trapped in a mans body is being pushed even at the Church, the Church has always thought sodomy buggery to be especially dirty practice ~ the use of the Bible against Christians by some Protestants the book we wrote ignoring tradition, we wrote down the words of our history and those of Christ and the Apostles ~ ask the Church not get between the Church and Christians ~ remaking the Church in their image ```

If you go to a homo sexual thing, I guess that's your business, if you consider it a sin and go that's you ~ I've never been in that spot thank God ```

Hope you've all had a Happy, Holy Easter ~ He is Risen ```
 

Sethrak

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Off topic- but about attending unlawful unions, I remembered today that I attended a remarriage of someone who was getting married for 5th time. So Im a hypocrite on all my words here. Lord have mercy!
There is no reason to couple yourself as hypocrite ~ remarriage is permitted ~ yes, with approval, But permitted ~ Momma years ago: I said I would never go to a wedding of someone who has divorced, how many times, she said have I eaten those words, she had 10 brothers two of which had divorced, don't know if the got the OK of the Bishop ~ but this is permitted ~ we know sin is bad, all sin, but becoming angry is not stealing, or injuring another human nor is looking at a great looking woman and catching fire inside compare to telling a lie that cost another money or puts him in jail, pampering and enabling a homosexual encourages continuation if you feel going to homosexual thing is doing that ~ you might should not go ~ I wouldn't ```
 

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There is no reason to couple yourself as hypocrite ~ remarriage is permitted ~ yes, with approval, But permitted ~ Momma years ago: I said I would never go to a wedding of someone who has divorced, how many times, she said have I eaten those words, she had 10 brothers two of which had divorced, don't know if the got the OK of the Bishop ~ but this is permitted ~ we know sin is bad, all sin, but becoming angry is not stealing, or injuring another human nor is looking at a great looking woman and catching fire inside compare to telling a lie that cost another money or puts him in jail, pampering and enabling a homosexual encourages continuation if you feel going to homosexual thing is doing that ~ you might should not go ~ I wouldn't ```
Unrepented sin can keep us away from God's presence. When we acknowledge that God is Master of our life, and yet choose sloth, lust of power, idle talk, and despair- we are turning away from the Light and going down into darkness. When we seek His moderation, humility, patience, and love- we actively seek His face and good pleasure. When we search our hearts and beg God to grant us to see our own sins and not to judge our brothers and sisters- we find we have started to climb upward into His grace. Lord have mercy.
 

Sethrak

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I agree
I really do not want to attend the union, but all my family from around the country is going to the event. So really bothered that I will miss the opportunity for the family reunion. I thought about showing up for before and after, but that is awkward and can only make matters worse. Anyway, anyone else had this struggle? Thanks
Is the family going to this thing you mentioned ~ will they be leaving for home right after ~ or can they be come to your place and camp out there ~ or are they going to relatives homes where you can invite yourself to each place ```

I think you can get together with them some must be renting rooms to stay couple days ~ how many people are you talking about ~ some must feel the way you do ~ this will give you a chance to have a bash at your place and you cousin at hers ~ remember the picnics you guys use to have ~ Shish Kebob, Pilav, Hats, Limajoon ~ meat bread, pizza mizza this and that and Uncle George on the Violin, Daddy on the tamboreen yev Black Jack dancing with a glass of wine on his chin ~ amen pan lav e ~ every thing is good ```

Everyone can do his part ~ Auntie Yester will make the Salad she makes wonderful salad and bread and Pilav, this is a chance of a life time and some who have seconds thought about coming may come when they hear of this ~ Suggest this to Cousin Maryann, she will contact everybody, she has kept in contact ~ Garabed ~ Gabriel has been looking for and excuse to come, I'll come to and bring Tamara, she's been wanting to meet you ```

Good luck, God be with you all ```
 
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