Thank you so much for these wise words. I started the topic because I'm now in my 30's and, at least in NY USA, there are more sightings of bigfoot than virtuous women. They seem astonished and disturbed that I believe in waiting till marriage. I really wonder how the Orthodox will replenish the faithful ! The catholic women don't seem terribly interested in chastity; and really its mostly fundamentalist evangelicals that are, nominally, trying to live chaste. I'm not a bad looking guy (my avatar is me) but I don't have much money or a good job. Still it just seemed like such a rarity I'm glad I've gotten some support and examples here.Fr Spyridon said:From the tone of many of these posts I'm guessing that a number of you are quite young men. Those of us who have reached an older age can verify it all gets easier once the body calms down and biology assumes you've done what you need to do to maintain the human race.
We are not cursed with these desires - God blessed us with a desire for our partner and should you allow that blessing to find its proper expression you will be closer to enjoying the fullness of what God intends for you. The quick, improper use will not be a longlasting joy. Remember the wedding at Cana - the last wine drawn was the best - a metaphor for the blessings that often come from many years shared in marriage - the deeper the relationship goes the better it can become.
There are plenty of faithful Orthodox women in the world. Sometimes a man will look past such a woman because of worldly ideals about beauty or body shape. However, if what your heart truly longs for is a righteous woman then you will be drawn to a righteous woman - you will be drawn to what you desire.
And if you want a righteous woman to be drawn to you, try to live out the gospel as well as you can - she'll find you. Remember - there are women out there seeking in a husband the virtues you seek in a wife - but ask yourself if such a woman would be attracted to you.
Keep praying. Keep fasting. The body will run amock if you let it, but will curb it's waywardness if you are stern with it and demand it follows your commands.
God bless you.
I do wonder what the most sexually conservative country is? Sadly, its probably Islamic. Perhaps Poland ?