Orthonorm's Dating and Relationship Advice Column

mabsoota

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give her your number.
you'll be married within a few months.








;)
 

Cyrillic

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Asteriktos said:
I did that OkCupid My Best Face thing. Basically you load pics to the site, they put one of your pics next to that of someone else, people vote, and then they tell you the results. According to them people who like my recent bearded/book pic the most include:

Dorks
Geeks
Liberals
Nerds
Girls 18-30

And people who disliked it include:

Stoners
Girls over 30

That's not too bad, now is it?
 

Asteriktos

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mabsoota said:
Asteriktos said:
I did that OkCupid My Best Face thing. Basically you load pics to the site, they put one of your pics next to that of someone else, people vote, and then they tell you the results. According to them people who like my recent bearded/book pic the most include:

Dorks
Geeks
Liberals
Nerds
Girls 18-30

And people who disliked it include:

Stoners
Girls over 30

i'm over 30 and i liked your picture...
:p
Yay! :)  I was mostly just joking though, first becomes geeky girls are my "type," but mostly because it's a stereotype that older guys want to be with the younger girls.

And there was more to the joke, but that's enough of an explanation.
 

Asteriktos

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So my date with Monika was tonight. I think it went well. First we ordered our food at the café, and then looked around the art place while we waited. It was dizzying how great it was. Not that we discussed anything major, I mean, it was a first date after all, mostly just some light chit chat like the kind you'd find on facebook or twitter. For example, we exchanged views on the current instability in Syria, and a progressing reconstruction of the recently vandalized portion of the great wall of china taking place near Jiuquan, that kinda stuff. Then our food was ready, which was good because I was as hungry as a hog in July. I had the Chilean sea bass, and she had the filet mignon with foie gras. Sure it took my entire week's food budget to pay for it, but you gotta impress, ya know? Gotta keep things classy.

After that we went roller skating at the Y. They have a skating night down there in the gym, it's BYOS (bring your own skates), so we had to borrow a pair from her sister for her to wear, but that worked out ok. I fell on my butt a few times, which was embarrassing, but overall that was fun. Afterwards we went to Burlington Coat Factory to do some browsing, and she picked out this awesome looking bookcase hutch in the baby depot section, she got a really good deal on that. So after that I took her home and helped her take the furniture in. We kissed goodnight, and that was it. Outstanding night! Can't wait till our next date...
 

Opus118

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Asteriktos said:
So my date with Monika was tonight. I think it went well. First we ordered our food at the café, and then looked around the art place while we waited. It was dizzying how great it was. Not that we discussed anything major, I mean, it was a first date after all, mostly just some light chit chat like the kind you'd find on facebook or twitter. For example, we exchanged views on the current instability in Syria, and a progressing reconstruction of the recently vandalized portion of the great wall of china taking place near Jiuquan, that kinda stuff. Then our food was ready, which was good because I was as hungry as a hog in July. I had the Chilean sea bass, and she had the filet mignon with foie gras. Sure it took my entire week's food budget to pay for it, but you gotta impress, ya know? Gotta keep things classy.

After that we went roller skating at the Y. They have a skating night down there in the gym, it's BYOS (bring your own skates), so we had to borrow a pair from her sister for her to wear, but that worked out ok. I fell on my butt a few times, which was embarrassing, but overall that was fun. Afterwards we went to Burlington Coat Factory to do some browsing, and she picked out this awesome looking bookcase hutch in the baby depot section, she got a really good deal on that. So after that I took her home and helped her take the furniture in. We kissed goodnight, and that was it. Outstanding night! Can't wait till our next date...
Lovely story Asteriktos. I hope this is true but the combination of Chilean sea bass and foie gras makes me wonder. I do get my $19 seersucker sport coats at Burlington, so you are in the right place for budget shopping. If it was her idea, she sounds sensible to me and conceivably would not cause you grief in the future.
 

Achronos

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William said:
How should you respond if you do something like hold a door open for a girl and she comments on how sweet she thinks that is?
You start up a conversation?

Or say only for you miss?
 

Asteriktos

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Some people say that I make jokes on this thread, but this is a very serious post. I have a certain discriminatory requirement when I am assessing a potential date/mate/bride. Specifically, I can't be with someone with stubby toes. I just can't. I'm sorry, it's just so off-putting. Does this make me a bad person?
 

TheTrisagion

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Asteriktos said:
Some people say that I make jokes on this thread, but this is a very serious post. I have a certain discriminatory requirement when I am assessing a potential date/mate/bride. Specifically, I can't be with someone with stubby toes. I just can't. I'm sorry, it's just so off-putting. Does this make me a bad person?
It depends on how you define stubby toes.  What is the maximum length of toes before you consider them unstubby?
 

Asteriktos

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I dunno, it's a visual thing I guess, not something I could measure.

Short:


Good:
 

TheTrisagion

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I find both examples to be somewhat unattractive.  One is too short and the other just looks like alien phalanges.
 

Asteriktos

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TheTrisagion said:
Hard to work with toes so sandy. Even in a scenario where... er... *checks what site he is on* ... never mind. :)
 

TheTrisagion

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That pic just makes me want to go to the beach.  Why am I stuck at work right now?  :(
 

Asteriktos

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So I had another date with Monika last night--or as she likes to be called, Moni (she likes it to be pronounced like Mani, because she has an interest in the founder of Manichaeism). Anyway, it was really good. We first stopped by the ice cream stand for a pre-date treat. I had a sunday, which was delicious, but perhaps a bit too sweet. She had a chocolate and vanilla twirl ice cream cone, which besides being quite good also provided a great ice breaker for talking about interracial relationships and marriage, and she had some fascinating theories on this, which I may post about in another thread.

After the ice cream we went to the business district and did a little window shopping, ending up eventually in Robert Ingersoll park. We found a bench in a nice secluded area and talked for hours. It's hard to put into words how well read and experience she is. Truly. Let me put it this way: I have never met anyone even close to her in knowledge of Maori mating rituals. It's astounding. It's like I'm reading a combination of wiki and the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, only she's the only author and editor.

It was beginning to get dark by that point, and it was looking like it was gonna rain fairly soon, so I asked if she'd like to get something to eat. She said yes, but that she wanted to cook the food. I thought that was a great idea, so we drove back to her house. She wouldn't let me even look in the kitchen while she was cooking, but it sure smelled fabulous! She asked me to find something to watch while we were eating, because she said she didn't like trying to talk when eating, she preferred watching or listening to something. As I was trying to figure out what to watch I was overjoyed to find that she was the owner of all seasons of all Star Treks ever made! I suggested we each watch the other's favorite episode of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, and she thought that was a great idea. Apparently it's her favorite Trek series as well.  ;D

So we watched and ate. She made this wonderful dinner with cream cheese stuffed chicken breasts, covered with just the right mix of spices, and some beautiful sweet corn puree, and on and on it went. She's a culinary wizard!  So for the Trek I picked Duet, which admittedly can get a bit melodramatic, but if you can get past some of the camp it has some really great lines in it. It's also definitely the best pre-Worf episode of the series. She chose In the Pale Moonlight, which she admitted is sort of cliché at this point since everyone says that's their favorite, but she wanted to give a nod to it nonetheless. Great episode.

After that I helped her clean up, and then we sat down on the couch again, but it was a bit awkward, because I didn't know if I should try to kiss her, or start talking, or what. Finally she smiled and her face turned red, and I slowly moved in, brushed her hair away, and gave her a very romantic kiss. About an hour and a half later she suggested that we watch a Trek marathon, which I was definitely up for, so we did that till about 4am. Anyway, so finally I woke up the next morning and drove back to my apartment to check on what's been up at oc.net. It was a great date!
 

Asteriktos

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TheTrisagion said:
How long are her toes?
I couldn't tell. It's like when the girl is in the bathroom and you check her phone to see if she is cheating on you with her neighbor across the hall... you're always scared she's gonna catch you, so you don't do a thorough job. Anyway, so she was sleeping, and there was a left over french fry on the nightstand, so I took that and measured her longest toe with the fry, then bit the fry off where her toe ended. Then in the morning I used a ruler to measure it, and it came out to 2 1/8 inches, but who knows how off that could be?  Either way, definitely an above average foot: long and slender and even (not a v shape), fairly long toes, not overly rough anywhere, no distracting tats or whatever, nice vascularity, just a nice looking foot, you know what I mean.
 

TheTrisagion

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Asteriktos said:
TheTrisagion said:
How long are her toes?
I couldn't tell. It's like when the girl is in the bathroom and you check her phone to see if she is cheating on you with her neighbor across the hall... you're always scared she's gonna catch you, so you don't do a thorough job. Anyway, so she was sleeping, and there was a left over french fry on the nightstand, so I took that and measured her longest toe with the fry, then bit the fry off where her toe ended. Then in the morning I used a ruler to measure it, and it came out to 2 1/8 inches, but who knows how off that could be?  Either way, definitely an above average foot: long and slender and even (not a v shape), fairly long toes, not overly rough anywhere, no distracting tats or whatever, nice vascularity, just a nice looking foot, you know what I mean.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
nice vascularity is important. Poor circulation in the feet can lead to major relationship problems down the road.
 

Asteriktos

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I make sure that all girls I am with understand the importance of them getting daily foot rubs from me. It's absolutely essential, for health reasons.
 

Opus118

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Asteriktos said:
TheTrisagion said:
How long are her toes?
Then in the morning I used a ruler to measure it, and it came out to 2 1/8 inches, but who knows how off that could be?  
It seems pretty off to me. But then again it is hard to find an excuse to use the term pretty/
 
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