Random Postings

[SouthSerb99]

Zoe,

I must tell you... you fit in just perfect.  You're as deranged as the rest of us.  Especially the HC Bandits!

 

[Ntinos]

Cleveland Metropolitan of Metaxa and All Brandy, Overstepper of all bounds - Μητροπολίτης Μεταξάς και Όλων Μπραντών

Hehehehe, perhaps Μητροπολίτης Ιεράς ÃŽÂ όλεως Μεταξά και πασών Μπραντών;;  ;D ;D ;D ;D

 

[Zoe]

The HC bandits, LOL.  I had a mental image of a bunch of priests with Zorro masks holding crosses...that's kinda messed up.

 

[Pravoslavbob]

But none shall be superior to those propogated by the Committees of the Holy Synod of Spirits - I think the Supreme Pontiff should comment on this and some of the other recent developments here-  including the supreme threat posed by bears.

Behold the number one furry menace. 

 

[Fr. George]

Oh yes, the HC Bandits...

"One for each other
and all for one
The three brave amigos are we"

 

[Zoe]

So no one ever answered me: is consorting with bears un-Alcoholic?

 

[Pravoslavbob]

Is consorting with bears un-Alcoholic?

Bears are notorious for being the ultimate omnivores.  I'm sure any self-respecting black bear would be delighted to guzzle any rye, bourbon, scotch, wine, beer etc. left in its path.  So no.  Consorting with bears does not have to be un-alcoholic. Iif a bear were let loose in a beer factory, the situation could involve an explosive amount of alcohol consumption, so beware the threat. 

 

[Zoe]

So sounds to me like bears would make a good drinking buddy, why all the hatred???!!!

 

[Pravoslavbob]

For the answer to this, you have to be willing to delve into the recent  deepest, darkest thread involving "Orthodox fundamentalism".  (Near the end.) AND you have to appreciate Cleveland's sense of humour.

 

[Fr. George]

Protocol 217662.02
Indiction 21

From the Bazaar,
to the Plentitude of the Faithful over the age of 21 in the US of A, and to all the faithful in the world abroad,
To the reverened Distillery Metropolitans, Distribution Despotas, Pricing Presbyters, Imbibing Deacons,
Instructors and students at the Bartending Universities,

The Great Distiller is revealed to us!

Is consorting with bears un-Alcoholic? 

After having been posed this question by one of the faithful here in the United States (who by terrible circumstance and through the puritanical tyrrany of our system of Government is deprived of the ability to obtain and consume Alchohol in public places), the members of the Great and Holy Synod of Spirits posed this question to the resident expert on the canonical issues dealing with Ursal Creatures, otherwise known as bears.  It is commonly known the great threat that bears can pose to society, and the nation has acknowledged this fact by officially recognizing that bears are the #1 terror threat to the world.  Because of the sensitive nature of relationships between human beings and bears, the Synod has amongst its members one who has devoted much of his time and energy and study to the subject of bears and the canonical relations with them.

Since the subject matter is of the utmost sensitivity and security (national security, of course), the Executive Committee of the Synod met with the Chair of the Committee, and he made it clear to our persons that. indeed, consorting with bears is alright, and I quote from his official recommendation to the Synod:

[quote author="Synodal Chairman of Canonical Issues Involving Bears - His All-Imbibedness the Metropolitan of Mead and all Beers"]
There is nothing un-Alcoholic with bear consorting activities.[/quote]

The Synod will now take this official and public recommendation, and the Chairman of the Synod will render a decision on the matter as soon as possible.

May He Who was born of The Virgin, and who performed His first miracle with the creation of Alchohol from the ultimate of sobriety, be with us in our celebration!  In His service we remain faithfully yours,

+ GEORGE
Metropolitan of Metaxa and all Brandy,
Cheif Secretariat of the Holy Synod of Spirits

MGB/gsc

 

[Fr. George]

ADDENDUM TO Protocol 217662.02

It is with our apologies that the official response of the Synodal Chair has been delayed, and we hope that the plentitude will have mercy on us and all bears who wish to co-imbibe peacefully with humans.

+GEORGE
Metropolitan of Metaxa and all Brandy, Overstepper of all bounds
Chief Secretariat of the Holy Synod of Spirits

MGB

 

[Zoe]

So am I meant to understand that consorting with bears, though not un-Alcoholic in nature, is much like playing with fire?  Containable, yet easy to lose control over?

 

[Fr. George]

And once you've lost control of the bears, then a great terror threat has been loosed upon the world.

 

[Zoe]

Even greater than using large fonts unnecessarily?

 

[Arystarcus]

GO CHICAGO BEARS!!!

 

[Arystarcus]

;D ;D ;D

 

[Zoe]

Pshh..fancy shmancy Mr. marquee.

The Browns cannot afford such frivolties..not that we'd want something like that, anyway!  *quiet sob*

 

[Arystarcus]

Pshh..fancy shmancy Mr. marquee.

I have too much free time on my hands... 

Then again, seeing as how this thread is on it's 28th page - a LOT of people have too much free time on their hands! 

 

[Zoe]

I've got so much time on my hands until school starts up I'm quit sure I'm about to collapse under its weight.

So.  Bears.

 

[Arystarcus]

That's ok, if you keep it up you'll ascend another rung on the OC.net ladder up to "member" status!  ;D

 

[Zoe]

Haha.  How many posts is that?

 

[Arystarcus]

I have no idea, but there's one way to find out! 

 

[Zoe]

 

[sdcheung]

...Got Free Time, Just rarely posting here.

 

[MaryCecilia]

Hmmm I don't know what's worse, the fact that I'm still awake at 6am, or the fact that I've just read this whole thread and was entertained by it?  hmm   Looks like we all have a lot of free time on our hands  

Mary

 

[Fr. George]

Oh, Zoe is probably going to earn Archon status in this thread if we keep it up the way we are!

 

[SouthSerb99]

Since this thread has been entirely about nothing, I just came across a picture, which is completely irrelevant to nothing, which I suppose means, relevant to something.  So I'm posting it.

As you might know, the World Cup of Soccer (or football as it is called across the pond) will commence in June of this year.  I will be supporting Serbia and Montenegro (Srbija i Crna Gora).  So I came across a picture of our star player, Mateja Kezman, taken after celebrating a goal he scored.

Not sure if you can make it out, but he is wearing a shirt with an Icon of Jesus.

 

[Fr. George]

Wow - I mean, I should have expected a tshirt icon on some athlete from an Orthodox country, but I guess actually seeing it is pretty cools still to me...

 

[Pedro]

Yeah, that is cool, though I don't much like icons on clothes.  BUT, at the risk of starting an actual conversation about Orthodoxy in this thread, that's all I'll say.

 

[Fr. George]

Pedro, I agree: let's not get into anything serious here on the thread - I think it would be an insult to serious Orthodox discussion!

 

[SouthSerb99]

Pedro,

  Even though you are a global mod, be forwarned, the *purported* Bishop of All Brandy, and clear Overstepper of All Bounds, will certainly attempt to usurp any and all powers that you yield.

    He truly is a shameless lad, as evidenced by his utter disregard for the pious Hierarchy on Holy Mt. Passout.

 

[Zoe]

OOoh, the PURPORTED Bishop of all Brandy...challenging.

I think we need an internal investigation, non?

 

[SouthSerb99]

I think the matter has been sufficiently examined, re-examined and examined again.  Each time, the conclusion has been the same.  The purported Bishop of All Brandy, Overstepper of All Bounds is a power hungry zealot.

He seeks supremacy over the Bishop of Slivo on Holy Mt. Passout.  There have also been some grumblings that he claims his stewardship over All Brandy, is infallible.  I have also been advised by a reliable source within his Holy Synod, that he intends to name Tom Cruise as a Archbishop in one of his Bishoprics.

 

[Fr. George]

Ahem, if anyone wishes to challenge the legitimacy of my ordination as Metropolitan of Metaxa and all Brandy, they may petition the Supreme Pontiff for the records of the Holy Synod, and may come to me personally to speak about the matter, over a glass of the Grand Fine Metaxa...

 

[SouthSerb99]

Who the heck is the Supreme Pontiff?  That had to be about 20 pages ago, and I've forgotten.

Oh, and the fine Metaxa just won't do.  How about this...

 

[Fr. George]

Our All-Imbibedness is insulted by the assertions made by the honorable Bishop of Schlivo, and wishes to address them at this moment...

1. We are insulted by the implication that we would even entertain ordaining Tom Cruise... There is no source within the synod, and there are no plans to ordain the aformentioned Mr. Cruise - all Ordinations of hierarchs of the liquors are passed through the Synod.

2. There is no claim to infallibility by our persons.

3. My "claims to stewardship over all Brandy" are not aspirations of our own, but my sacred duties as handed down to us by the tradition of the Church and Synod of her bishops.  We did not ask to be Metropolitan of all Brandies, but it is what the Great Distiller has intended.

We appreciate that the honorable Bishop of Schlivovitz has brought these concerns into the open, but the needless rhetoric and the use of "unnamed sources" which are figments of his imagination are unfortunate.

 

[Fr. George]

The Supreme Pontiff, President of the Holy Synod of Spirits, is the Bishop of Bourbon...
Remember, information and decisions of the Holy Synod are both in this thread and the Top Ten Time Wasters thread....

 

[SouthSerb99]

I make a direct appeal to... His Inebriatedness the Bishop of Bourbon, Vicar of the Great Distiller, Successor to the Prince of the Apprentices of the Great Distiller, Supreme Pontiff of All Alcohol, Patriarch of all Grain-Based Alcohols, Primate of Kentucky, Archbishop and Metropolitan of All Whisky, Sovereign of Loretto, and Servant of the Servants of the Great Distiller.

The purported Bishop of All Brandy, Overstepper of Allbounds, caretaker of heretics and associate of Scientologists, has repeatedly, unabashedly and without any forthought sought to suppress the Bishop of Slivo.  He has done so with the self imposed and artificially stated title of "Bishop of All Brandy". 

As I have stated repeatedly, this title is, by definition, uncanonical.  I ask that you make a formal declaration, stripping this interloper of this false title.

 

[Zoe]

SCHISM!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Ntinos]

Actually, oh Metropolitan of all Brandies, I heard that the bishop of Armagnac is using fractional distillation in performing the distillation, in order to differentiate from the chief distillation dogmas of the Holy Synod of "Spirits"...