I was in a place like that once, and a friend told me to just pick one option. If it wasn't right, that would become clear in time. When he offered that advice, I took it, made the choice, and never regretted it.Ansgar said:Maybe, but why does my pebbles feel like fieldstones? To tell you the truth, there's very little I'm certain about. Nothing seems to be straightforward anymore, and I'm afraid to make a choice.TheTrisagion said:Even with all those things, Orthodoxy is still beautiful, exciting and wondrous. Those controversies are just the little pebbles that get in your shoe as you walk through the wonderful, wild outdoors of Orthodoxy.Ansgar said:In these days, when the forum is flooded with threads about ecumenism, controversies and bearded ladies, I like to think back to the days when I had just discovered Orthodoxy and everything was beautiful, exciting and wondrous. Those were the days, before everything became confusing and I had to spend every day concerning myself with questions about whether or not I'm making the right choices.
This is also when I realise that it has been 5 years. 5 years, and I still haven't converted. I'm not even sure if that is a good or a bad thing.
Sorry, I just needed a little rant.
I wish I could say the same was the case with subsequent decisions in which I applied that advice. The principle proved true--I always found out eventually whether or not I had made the right choice--but that is little comfort when you figure out that you made the wrong choice and have to deal with the resulting crap as you try to turn the ship around. But perhaps that is unavoidable. Anyway, not making a choice is making the choice to be stuck. And "stuck" is its own hell.
Prayers. I have been/am there. Many others are, too.
FWIW, if I didn't read your "little rant", I would never have realised you weren't yet a member of the Orthodox Church.