Poppy
OC.Net Guru
- Joined
- May 27, 2011
- Messages
- 1,119
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 0
- Location
- i'm in barkshar
- Website
- www.zsl.org
السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ (the peace upon you and mercy of God and blessings)
I want ask about some thing I find really difficult about Orthodoxy or my perception of it without either being antagonistic for the sakes of it, or causing offense accidentally which is why I started with a blessing, because if we start with a good intention and remember God then that is always the best way to begin huh. I been on OC forum a long time now and even from when I was Inquirer and then almost Catecumen at St Elias and then a long silence when I reverted to Islam so, my point is, I always came here to learn and not to cause grief to no one.
I;m just going to come out with it. If you got stuck in a tricky situation in a area that was bad with some people who seemed dubious, I could probably be helpful in getting us out of it safely and also I can defend myself really well too with my mouth and with my ability to fight (I don't really do that any more though) but academic smarts are not my forte although I am a bright person and sometimes insightful but usually only accidentally so. Ok so that brings me to why I often felt excluded from the core of people when I used to attend service for a while. It wasn't at all the reason why I didn't choose Orthodoxy; that would be a stupid reason. I did remember feeling it keenly though.
Now, you might say to me, that is the way you feel Poppy and it has nothing to do with the teachings and understanding of the people about the Church and I would agree with you, it could all just be my insecurities about myself and there could just coincidentally be more people in the Orthodox Church that are super intelligent. (Conversely and somewhat ironically, I found when I went to the Hillsong/Vineyard churches for a while when I was searching for something religious, I went to the Alpha Course and felt literally nauseous at some of the dumbest answers I got when I asked doctrinal questions. Like some of the answers literally contradicted each other or it seemed people were so emotional about their church experience that they had kissed even sensible conclusions goodbye)
I'm not suggesting in any way that I came across people who excluded me when I went attended Orthodox service, on the contrary, eveyone was kind and helpful as they can be, well most people apart from one. So it wasn't that anyone could have helped do or be anything other than what they were.
Does anyone get me? Or are you losing the will to live?
Do you think that various kinds of C(c)hristian churches attract specific kinds of people though or is it a cultural thing? Say for instance, If I went to a Orthodox service and joined a community in a relatively poor country or maybe even a affluent country but where the culture is different then I might find a difference in the focus of the discussions and teaching?
I'm not doing well saying it clearly, sorry.
I'm not complaining either but I just felt and still feel that often for me the effort in trying to understand elements of the doctrine and rites and reasons for acts, get's in the way of me remembering what the focus is and I end up anxious because I feel like I have an intellectual ceiling and If I can't reach where you are all at then I kind of feel 'less than' in my faith. Again, that's a bit wrong for me to say that because I never really got as far as having a faith in The Christian church.
Do you think I am overthinking it? I just don't accept that they way I feel is 'all' me though.
I probably started a thread like this before, years ago. I did look see if there was one but I couldn't locate it so...
I want ask about some thing I find really difficult about Orthodoxy or my perception of it without either being antagonistic for the sakes of it, or causing offense accidentally which is why I started with a blessing, because if we start with a good intention and remember God then that is always the best way to begin huh. I been on OC forum a long time now and even from when I was Inquirer and then almost Catecumen at St Elias and then a long silence when I reverted to Islam so, my point is, I always came here to learn and not to cause grief to no one.
I;m just going to come out with it. If you got stuck in a tricky situation in a area that was bad with some people who seemed dubious, I could probably be helpful in getting us out of it safely and also I can defend myself really well too with my mouth and with my ability to fight (I don't really do that any more though) but academic smarts are not my forte although I am a bright person and sometimes insightful but usually only accidentally so. Ok so that brings me to why I often felt excluded from the core of people when I used to attend service for a while. It wasn't at all the reason why I didn't choose Orthodoxy; that would be a stupid reason. I did remember feeling it keenly though.
Now, you might say to me, that is the way you feel Poppy and it has nothing to do with the teachings and understanding of the people about the Church and I would agree with you, it could all just be my insecurities about myself and there could just coincidentally be more people in the Orthodox Church that are super intelligent. (Conversely and somewhat ironically, I found when I went to the Hillsong/Vineyard churches for a while when I was searching for something religious, I went to the Alpha Course and felt literally nauseous at some of the dumbest answers I got when I asked doctrinal questions. Like some of the answers literally contradicted each other or it seemed people were so emotional about their church experience that they had kissed even sensible conclusions goodbye)
I'm not suggesting in any way that I came across people who excluded me when I went attended Orthodox service, on the contrary, eveyone was kind and helpful as they can be, well most people apart from one. So it wasn't that anyone could have helped do or be anything other than what they were.
Does anyone get me? Or are you losing the will to live?
Do you think that various kinds of C(c)hristian churches attract specific kinds of people though or is it a cultural thing? Say for instance, If I went to a Orthodox service and joined a community in a relatively poor country or maybe even a affluent country but where the culture is different then I might find a difference in the focus of the discussions and teaching?
I'm not doing well saying it clearly, sorry.
I'm not complaining either but I just felt and still feel that often for me the effort in trying to understand elements of the doctrine and rites and reasons for acts, get's in the way of me remembering what the focus is and I end up anxious because I feel like I have an intellectual ceiling and If I can't reach where you are all at then I kind of feel 'less than' in my faith. Again, that's a bit wrong for me to say that because I never really got as far as having a faith in The Christian church.
Do you think I am overthinking it? I just don't accept that they way I feel is 'all' me though.
I probably started a thread like this before, years ago. I did look see if there was one but I couldn't locate it so...